Pondering...

While my dear husband watches a movie I don't really care for I will take this opportunity to vent my ponderings. And I am truly using those two words intentionally! I think my ponderings have become too volumous for my brain to contain and I need to let them "air out."

Pondering Christmas... I read of a family that doesn't exchange presents. They enjoy the holiday(s) by spending time with those they love and baking or creating things for family & friends. After trying to squeeze in a trip to the mall today and walk out with only 1 item, this thought continues to gain popularity with me. Maybe it's because I'm frustrated with my kids' nap schedules. Maybe it's the distance to the mall. Maybe it's something else entirely. Hmmmm. I love to bake. And at my house I eat most of what I bake - amazing that I don't weigh 300 pounds by now. :) I have a friend that adores my banana bread. I don't know what's different about it, it's just the Betty Crocker recipe in the book. But because I know she loves it, I always make a 2nd loaf for her. In fact, I sometimes make it just because of her. Isn't that a pretty good gift? Warm banana bread and the warm feeling that someone was thinking about you & did something special just for you? Isn't that the same thing that we are doing with other gifts? On another side, I do love receiving gifts. My husband is a wonderful giver. He brought home a jazzy Christmas CD from Starbucks. I love it. He knows and remembers the little things and gives wonderful gifts because of that. I'm not naturally a "giver" most of the time. He has really brought it out the last few years. I know if we were to decide change the way we give gifts it would be a difficult decision for him.

On a lighter note... We were joking around in the kitchen and asking each other to choose between a food item and our spouse. Hmmmm! I asked if he would pick me over Taco Bell. I win! He said, "there's still Taco Time!" He asked if I would pick him over cookies. Oooooohhhh, no you didn't just go there! Ack! I know he makes me happy in ways cookies cannot. But if I were to choose cookies I would eternally regret it and also get really fat because I would try to replace him and the joy he brings me. Would he choose me over bean burritos? Yea, I win again! Would I choose him over peppermint mochas?? Yeah, he's worth it!

Back to Pondering - Cooking.... How is it possible that I can cook all the foods that go into a Thanksgiving dinner but mess up so many other dinners? I make great mashed potatoes. I can make "fresh" cranberry sauce. I have done a turkey (just not this year) and it turned out pretty good. My pies turned out PERFECT. And I'm not even bragging - I'm just as surprised as everyone else! Even after my bread disaster (was in the oven - still in the plastic - when I preheated the oven for pies), I felt so confident with all the things I made. But tonight I made spaghetti. Spaghetti is my back up dinner, I can make it from scratch without looking at a recipe. It's not perfected yet but it's pretty darn good. I thought I would try to thicken up the sauce by adding flour to the cooked ground beef & onions. But then I opened the wrong can - diced tomatoes instead of tomato sauce. That kind of messed it up. I added tomato sauce also and the big tomatoes tasted good. I was out of oregano. Hmmm, will extra basil make up for that? Probably not, so I tossed in "Italian Seasoning." Yes, I know that bottle has both basil & oregano in it. It turned out okay but all the ground beef seemed to be "gravy-ish." Whoops, probably not a good idea to add flour at that point. Probably should have tried to thicken with bread crumbs instead. Here's the pondering part: is this God's way to keeping me humble? Or should I stick to recipes? And read the recipe? And follow the recipe and not use it as a guideline? I don't know. I like recipes as guidelines - that's how my mom and grandma cook. Never ask my mom what a dish is called! It is always called what it is - chicken on rice with veggies, beef on pasta, chicken on pasta, beef on rice, pork on rice. Nevermind that the sauce could be literally anything: sweet & sour, teriyaki, marinara, alfredo, stroganoff, or a brand new one Mom made up!

Well, I have lost the rest of my ponderings so I will have to stop now. Perhaps I will sleep better tonight now that I have more room in my brain. :) Good night all...

Sleep, Glorious Sleep

I know that this is pretty much the only topic I write about, but it's huge! Last time I posted, we were on a schedule that allowed me to get more than 3 consecutive hours of sleep. Wonderful. However, almost right after I said that, she changed again. Suddenly she was falling asleep nursing and staying asleep through the transfer to the crib and awaking every 3 hours for the rest of the night. I assumed she was hungry - and most of the time she was. But a few days ago she wasn't really hungry at 10 pm or 1 am; she only nursed for a few minutes and was quickly asleep. Hmmmmm, could she be ready to consolidate her night feedings? I hope I hope I hope I hope! So last night we let her cry at 11 pm. She cried for about half an hour before I decided to feed her. (See Nina's blog for doctor's appointment and development news.) It was late already and I'm having problems sleeping now too. :) I just can't seem to wind down. And - funny story - I took a bath well before bed, nearly fell asleep a few times in the water but once I was in bed I was awake! Well, she's finally asleep again (cried for 45 minutes tonight). Maybe she will sleep a little harder this stretch. Here's hoping!

More Sleep!

It's been a while since I've posted anything here. For good reason! We honestly tried NCSS for a good long time. While naps steadily improved, the nights never really changed and then one day the grace and patience was gone. David has been a huge help lately, taking over the "listening" times so I could catch just a few more winks. My mom & sister came over for a few days and I really got caught up by the end of their visit. I don't feel rested when I get up, but I'm so much more normal now! Here's what several nights looked like while they were here:
7:00 begin bedtime routine (bath, massage, jammies, nurse)
8:00 fell asleep nursing, placed in crib
9:00 woke up crying, was comforted then cried for an hour (don't worry, she was checked on often!)
10:00 fell asleep without nursing, without pacifier!
4:00 am woke up to nurse & fall asleep immediately
8:00 woke up for the day, happy & content!

Something changed when my mom left and the last few nights have been a little more interesting:
7:00 begin bedtime routine
8:00 placed in crib awake (she just stopped falling asleep while nursing)
9:00 fell asleep without pacifier or nursing
3:00 am woke up to nurse
6:00 woke up to nurse
8:00 woke up for the day (happy, content, quiet!)

I have to say that although the crying is difficult, it has been worth it. Her attitude in general is improving. My mom encouraged me to leave the kids with her several times (I nearly went into shock without them) and Nina tolerated her just fine.
To Do: get Nina used to other caregivers (especially relatives & favorite babysitters), wean Nina from Mama's hip, help Nina find things to soothe herself (pacifiers, lovies, thumb or fingers).

Day 8 Evaluation

Here is the log I kept from Nina's first night on NCSS:

Bedtime: 8:30 (had been 10pm)
Wakings: 8:40-9:00, 9:55-10:05, 1:35-1:50am, 5:05-5:25, 7:30 up for the day. Each waking (except 9:55) she nursed back to sleep.
Night Wakings: 4 Longest sleep span: 3.5 hrs Total sleep: 9 hours, 50 min.
*Comments: This was actually a very good night. Often she would also wake frequently (every few minutes) between 10 & 1:30.
**Problems addressed: 1) nursing to sleep, 2) frequent & short day naps, 3) late bedtime. Methods: 1) Changed day sleep cues - car, stroller, dancing; 2) began using Gentle Removal Plan for nursing to sleep, introduced lovie & binky at night; 3) tried bedtime as early as 6 pm rather than 3rd nap.

Log from 10/16 (Day 7)

Bedtime: 6:45
Wakings: 7:30-7:45, 8-8:10, 8:13-8:35, 8:45-9:15, 9:25-9:40, 1:15-1:30 am, 4:54-5:19, 5:22-5:28, 5:30-5:35, 7:45 up for the day. Most wakings she was comforted by a binky & rocking. Four times she nursed back to sleep (including 1 & 5 am which would be normal feedings anyway).
Night Wakings: 9 Longest sleep span: 3 hours, 35 min. Total hours of sleep: 10 hours, 37 min.
*Comments: This was one of the worse nights in the week. I had kept her up late on 10/15 so the 6:30 bedtime may have been quite a shock to her. Probably should have tried to ease her back into the early bedtime. Also, let her cry for about 5 minutes during the 8:45 waking. She didn't seem to be comforted by anything I did.
**Progress: She now takes 2 good naps, each usually 1 hour or more. Although Will wakes her up a lot. Removal Plan is working slowly. After 5-10 attempts to remove her, she will finally sleep but often w/ a binky.
***Problems: 1) may not be ready for such an early bedtime, 2) frequent night wakings(!), 3) day time sleep still not what she needs. Methods: 1) try for 3rd nap around 5 or 6 pm & an 8 or 9 pm bedtime, 2) introduced solids this week but she insists on blowing raspberries in it. Not much is going down.

Overall Evaluation: There seems to be an AMAZING grace on me & my patience to do this . I am definitely aware & questioning "what am I teaching her?" "What does she need to learn here?" There are a few issues that are unique to her that NCSS won't address, and so we will be modifying our approach. It's not just about her & my sleep. It's also about her attitude & patterns we are teaching her to expect. (So if anyone is reading this as results from strict adherence to NCSS, that's not quite what we're doing.) Bottom line is I am happy w/ her day times, if only her nights were so easy!

Saturday Night, Sunday Naps

Ok, I messed up her bed time because we went out w/ friends last night. I was hoping to start her bedtime routine while watching a movie w/ my friend but she would not do it. On the plus side: she fell asleep in the car on the way home from the restaurant. Asleep in the car & in the dark! Hasn't happened in months! So we got a late start on bedtime....

Night Waking Log
Fell asleep nursing at 11 pm
1:00-1:20, woke up crying, fell asleep nursing (probably would've gone back to sleep w/ a binky)
3:30-4:00, woke up crying, fell asleep nursing after attempting the binky
7:45 am, up for the day

Nap Log
11am - 12:00 pm, fell asleep on my lap w/ binky, slept in church crib (had to wake her up to nurse before leaving church)
2:30-3:40, fell asleep nursing (she didn't nurse well earlier), slept in crib

Overall, I am pleased w/ her naps. They are better in length and consistency. I'll keep my formal NCSS log tonight & tomorrow, our 7th day on this plan.

Friday Night, Saturday Naps

Night Log:
7:30 pm, fell asleep nursing
8:30, woke up crying, tried binky/dancing/burping, nursed to sleep
9:30, woke up crying, tried binky/dancing/burping & nursing, still awake.... let her cry for a few minutes, tried to comfort her for about 10 minutes, let her cry again, etc.
10:30, Daddy takes over, rocks & cuddles her
11:00, Mama comes back, nurses to sleep
11:30, woke up crying, burped, fell asleep
4:44 am, woke up, nursed to sleep but continued to wake up & burp every few minutes until 5:30
8:30 am up for the day

Naps:
10:30ish, was groggy, Mama attempted to put her in bed. Oops, second wind came & I missed the window of opportunity!
11:00 am, tiredness returns, let her cry in crib (I sat on the floor) for a few minutes, wasn't comforted by me holding her so I let her cry a little more & tried again, etc.
11:30-12:45, slept in crib
3:30-5?, fell asleep in my arms (after crying a few minutes in the crib), slept in crib

Nina's Sleep...

From today through Sunday I will be focusing a lot of effort to change Nina's sleep patterns. Last Sunday I began following a plan laid out in "The No-Cry Sleep Solution." I haven't seen the success I was hoping for with her night time wakings. A big part of the problem is her habit of falling asleep while nursing. Today we began a concentrated effort to change that. Usually she will start her morning by eating and then staying awake (& working very hard to stay awake) until the next feeding time. Then she falls asleep & the pattern is set for the day. Our first change today was when she began to get tired I held her (without a pacifier but with her lovie) and put her in her crib just before she truly fell asleep. Good start. :) Next nap time approached and Will needed to get outside anyway, so we took a walk. We were outside probably 30 minutes before she finally fell asleep, even with all the noise and jostling. Great, two in a row! I'll be charting her progress here whenever it is worth the effort.

Naps Today (Friday):
8 am- 9:30, fell asleep being held, slept in crib
11:30 am - 12:30, fell asleep in stroller, slept in carseat
EDIT
Can't remember her last nap of the day. Whatever it was, I expected her to get tired again at 6:30 so getting her into bed by 7 wouldn't be hard. What I didn't expect was for David to get home really late & I had already put both kids in the bathtub. Kind of hectic for a while.

Pumpkins!

Oct 1 022
Originally uploaded by Nickie R.

We went to a pumpkin patch last Saturday as a family. Nina doesn't really fit into her warm clothes yet so she had a lot of layers on. This is really posted for Auntie Ty who bought the outfit she was wearing that day. Thanks Auntie Ty Ty!

Great Recipe

Make a great recipe the other day. It was based on Taco-Filled Pasta Shells but I used elbow macaroni instead. It was very good and AMAZINGLY it not only filled 3 adults, but actually seemed to make about 6-8 servings. (Two of my adult diners are big eaters.) See Taco-Filled Pasta Shells (7/6/05; no I don't know how to link a previous post) for the actual ingredients. The process is what I changed...

Brown ground beef, add Taco seasoning & water as usual.
Add 1 can of refried beans and 1 c. salsa to cooked meat, mix together and heat through.
Cook 1 lb. elbow macaroni in 4 qt. pot.
Drain pasta, return to pot and stir in 1 c. salsa.
Add meat mixture to pasta, stir together.
Serve from pot, garnish with shredded cheddar or sour cream.

This gave me the complete control of WHO had dairy in their dinner. I suppose it would have been very good to mix the cheese in with the meat & all the rest, but then I would've had to eat it too. Adding it at the end was fine and everyone liked it. Goal: stretch 1 lb of ground beef through 2 meals for 4 adults. Result: Large quantity of leftovers, seemed to be roughly 6-8 servings all together, everyone was both full and happy. Mission accomplished!

Someday I'll....

My dream of an ideal week:

Each day spend a minimum of 1 hour alone w/ each child
5 days a week cook a meal (full dinner w/ veggies, protein & carbs) (cook time is approx 1 hour each day)
Spend no more than 2 hours planning said meals
No more than 2 shopping trips (4 hours max) finding groceries for said meals
Have someone over for dinner once a week minimum (approx. 3 hours not including cleaning the house)
Maintain order in the house (1 hour daily)
Clean said house (2 hours weekly)
Scrapbook every other week for 2 hours (uninterrupted!)
Email & blog daily, minimum of 15 minutes, maximum 1 hour
Go shopping just for fun or spend time with friends, 1 hour daily as a guideline, max is 4 hours per week (Sometimes one big outing will fill that need for fresh air & fellowship & leave me gasping for some solitary time!)
Alone time w/ husband 1 hour daily minimum
SUBTOTAL: 30 hours

Other chores that could possibly be done better or quicker with greater organization:
Laundry = 5 hours per week max
Changing Diapers = 5 hours per week max (this wouldn't be so much but Nina's spitting up requires several clothes changes for her and often for me too!)
Other "maintain order" duties such as dishes, sweeping, wiping, mopping, etc = 1 hour per day, max!
SUBTOTAL: 15 hours

Total: 45 hours in one week.

Then there's the sometimes list:
a date night once a month (2-3 hours without kids)
seeing my family or in-laws (some weekly, some monthly)
time to paint the guest room, bathroom & master
gardening, cooking for fun (cookies!), taking more pictures of things other than my kids,
reading a magazine uninterupted, sewing.

And lastly, there's the someday list:
Learn to quilt, take a tap class, keep a separate scrapbook for each child, teach my daughter to cook, teach my son to do laundry...

I'd better write these down so I don't forget. In ten years I will have different priorities and a different kind of schedule with different responsibilities. It will be interesting to see how my someday wish list changes or has things crossed off!

I finally tried to make enchiladas...

Don't lose or forget this recipe!

from can of La Victoria's Enchilada Sauce:

4 corn tortillas
3 oz shredded mild cheddar cheese
3 oz shredded Montery Jack cheese
1/4 c. chopped yellow onion
1 T. oil (for frying - might be less)
1 can (10 oz) La Victoria Enchilada Sauce

Preheat oven to 350*. Heat oil in skillet over medium heat. Fry each tortilla 3 seconds per side. Drain on paper towels. Mix the two shredded cheeses together and set aside 2 oz cheese. Pour a small amount of enchilada sauce in a shallow pan. Coat both sides of the torilla in the enchilada sauce. Fill each tortilla with 1 oz of cheese, 1 T. onion and 1 T. sauce. Roll tortillas and place seam side down in casserole dish. Pour remaining sauce over enchiladas and sprinkle the remaining cheese over the top. Bake at 350* for 15 min. Remove from oven and cool for 5 min before serving.
Serves 2-3

My notes: I used 6 tortillas (easier to split for 3 adults). Added cooked chicken to all tortillas, no cheese on two (for me!) My onion wasn't chopped small enough to some bites were more onion than chicken - ewwwww. Otherwise a very good and simple recipe. I had two enchiladas left over but were quickly eaten the next day. :)
BUT Nina got fussy two days after eating this. It may have been too spicy for her, or it was the pepperoni pizza we had the day before she became fussy. Hmmmm. Probably won't try this one again until we find the root of the fussiness.

Hi Renne'!

My good friend Renne' Gilliam is almost done with her year in South Africa, but she has FINALLY begun a blog! There is a link to her page on the sidebar. Check it out & you've got to see her pictures!!

7 Secrets of Calm Moms

This article was published in Parenting, September 2004. I've kept it around as a reminder.

1. Figure out what sets you off
2. Don't take it personally
3. Ask for what you really need
4. Don't leave your home without portable entertainment
5. Count to ten... and back again
6. Gain some perspective
7. Stop beating yourself up

Here is each point explained but in my own words

1. "A mom meltdown doesn't appear out of nowhere." I am impatient when: it's raining, I'm in a hurry, have a headache, or feel helpless. What can I do to prevent or alleviate these? A) carry an umbrella in the car, B) allow more time than I think I need, C) carry Extra-Strength Tylenol in my purse, D) ask God for help!

2. When a child is crying in the store or someone needs discipline I try to remember that other kids do this too. This time it's mine, next time it might be yours. When I see other kids act up or babies crying, I USUALLY don't judge the parent. And my friends (who have normal children too) are very gracious & understanding. I try to be that for them (or strangers.)

3. What can make me happy (or calm?) I can't ask Will to be perfect or to stop what he's doing. Both of those are completely foreign concepts to him. But I can redirect his focus; help him change activities. Worst case scenario I have to be honest with David and not an impatient, emotional mess. If I need time alone to process or pray or cry I need to say so.

4. The title seemed misleading the first time but it really is practical. Will is not entertained by finger puppets but he does like books, cars and baby's rattles.

5. For me, this is knowing when to freak out and when not to, very similar to number six.

6. Two ways to see this: 1) knowing the difference between inconvenience and catastrophe, and 2) knowing that these struggles will not last forever. Sharpie on my beautiful island, lotion puddles on the carpeted stairs, water spills. The Sharpie incident required discipline (he knows he's not supposed to open that drawer) but it could've been scissors. The lotion was an accident and luckily it didn't leave a stain. Water spills are inconvenient for sure, especially when I find them with my socks. But we have been blessed and protected from so many other accidents. My mom encourages me often with "he won't go to college like this." It reminds me that we are training him for the future but also that somethings will take time. The truth is that he won't go to college with his pacifier or not knowing how to take a nap. He won't go to college still wearing a diaper.

7. "Calm moms don't keep track of mistakes." So maybe he watched too much TV the other day, or I lost it & it upset him. Maybe my heart wasn't in the right place when I disciplined him. I have to move on. Fix or change the root of the problem (when it's mine!) and get ready for tomorrow.

Tiredness & Maturity

I was at the neighbor's house a few nights ago and Nina was fighting sleep. Very normal for her age. She was arching her back and crying, very obviously frustrated. Someone made a comment like "why do we have to be adults before we can admit that we're tired?" So true. My baby doesn't want to miss what's going on, she doesn't want to sleep, she is soooo tired but isn't mature enough to recognize it. Will is only a little further down that path. When he's overtired every little thing will set him off. I read several books on sleep habits and the most useful thing I gleaned is this: catch them BEFORE they're overtired. That's easy with Nina - she has the usual sleepy cues of rubbing her eyes or ears or just zoning. Will has NO cues. He goes from being a happy kid who is playing well to a tired little guy who isn't sure what to do with himself very quickly. Unfortunately it is a slippery slope at that point. He can very quickly disintegrate into an overtired fit. Right now it is 2 o'clock, a while past his old nap time (he used to go down at 1 pm.) We realized that scheduling nap times by the clock was part of our problem. Some days he got to play most of the morning and was tired at noon. Other days we went grocery shopping and he might not get tired until 2. My hope is that by this time next year we will be a little more scheduled. He will recognize numbers then. When he's good at that I want to put a digital clock in his room with other clocks nearby indicating when is a good time to get out of bed in the morning and quiet time. I really don't think he'll be taking naps much longer. They're hit & miss right now. He certainly needs the extra sleep!
Anyway, back to my point. It's so common for kids to resist naps and bedtimes. Even sweet, accomodating kids ask to stay up sometimes. Where is that magic moment of maturity? I'm trying to remember.... When did I become old enough to WANT to go to bed? When did I realize that when I stay up I still have to get up in the morning? Was it high school? Was it my first 5-day a week job? Was it when I had to be responsible - when others depended on me? Was it the kids? I can't remember.

Session Cooking?

As the school year is coming up I have been thinking about ways to save time. (Funny that this seems to be timed with the school year, though - almost nothing in my life and schedule will change the first week of September....) Anyway, I have been searching for some menu planning tools. I found software and charts and a lot of time-saving recipes. One plan was for a way to use 35 pounds of ground beef! Wow! If I had another freezer I would have room for this. But not now. I have probably about 8-10 pounds of frozen hamburger and a couple pork chops in there now. I'm just thinking out loud now, but maybe if Will was with Grandma for a whole day I would do this "session cooking" thing. But then where would I put it all?

Niks Piks 2

Just some good pictures taken during Tacoma's Tall Ships Festival....

And two cutie pies!

So many thoughts....

.... so little time! I have had some really good and serious questions that all deserve some attention, some time meditating and contemplating, some exploring, some writing and some prayer. But it has been so crazy lately! Sometime I will find a moment to do this. Until then, keep visiting my Xanga page.... http://www.xanga.com/home.aspx?user=nickieroo

Little Boys

Mamas of little boys never forget certain moments. The first time they kicked in utero and gave us a sense of their personality. The first time they had hiccups and it hurt every bone and organ in our bodies. The moment of their birth, with the warm little body finally making its entrance. The first time they sit or crawl or roll over, each one uniquely spectacular. And then the big one comes: they walk. A few halting steps, a few bumps, a few sudden sits, a few smiles, a few tears, and then they walk. It's just a matter of time (days, probably) until they learn to walk faster. And then life changes. Most of the big physical milestones are met and mamas now belong to an elite and demanding physical trainer who is less then 3 feet tall. Chasing, chasing, chasing. Discipline, hugs, maybe a cold or the flu will slow him down? Maybe. They are so independent but still want their mama. A hug for the owie, help finding that certain car, making a snack for that ever hungry little man. And soon they talk. I hear that most boys (like mine) choose really important first words: truck, rock, car, Dada. Mama is always there so she doesn't need a word, does she? But he comes to me to snuggle, to warm up, to cry, to complain. Recently he started calling Mama? when I was leaving his bedroom - a plea to turn around to stay. I can't help but look. Does he need me or is he delaying bedtime? Have to check. Soon he will understand emotions. I'm looking forward to the first time he says "I love you." He will probably say it to something or someone else first, but when it's my turn it will make my whole day brighter.

For Nina Dian Robbs

Dear Nina,
Sometimes when I look at you I can hardly believe that you're really here. Just one year ago I began to hope for you. Another baby, maybe even a girl? And now you're here. Flesh and blood and as cute as can be. I like to think that maybe you look like me even though we don't. But you have my hair and skin. We'll just see about the rest. There are so many things I told your brother when he was a baby and now I'll tell you the same ones. You are loved. You are wanted. God knew that your daddy & I needed a sweet little girl full of grace to be in our family. You bring joy to everyone that knows you. You are a wonderful baby. Your smile makes everyone around you smile back. You are my favorite little Nina. No one will ever be a better Nina than you are. You are so special. You already love your brother and you laugh at him all the time. When he was a baby I dubbed him my Mini Muffin - my little Mini Blueberry Muffin. And now he is bigger and isn't a mini muffin anymore, he's a big Blueberry Muffin. That makes you the new mini muffin. I wondered while I was pregnant what kind of muffin you would be. Would you be apple or currant, spice or carrot cake muffin? It turns out that you are my Mini coffee Cake Muffin. The kind of little tiny muffin that is all brown sugar and goodness with streusel topping drizzled all over for good measure. I can't wait to see how that is played out in your life. Last summer I prayed almost every night for God to give us another baby. There were tears and questions, hopes and longings. When we discovered we were pregnant with you I cried. I cried for joy. In December we found out you were a girl - our little Nina Dian. We had a boy's name for back up but we knew you were a girl already. Nina was the only name that fit you. Grace Divine. Several months later we cried and prayed for you to be born. I believe God picked the day for you to arrive, He just didn't tell me when it was. You were such a big baby and you kicked so hard! Once I think you cracked one of my ribs (well, badly bruised for sure.) I became so uncomfortable at the end but it seemed you would never come. As I put your clothes away and waited for you I would tell you about all the pretty things that were waiting for you. Shoes, hats, headbands, dresses, jammies, socks, all specially picked out just for you. Since Will came 10 days after his due date we calculated that for you. That day was Thursday, May 5, 2005. That was also the National Day of Prayer. Since Grandma & Grandpa Robbs, Auntie Manders and Daddy were all involved in that I was hoping that you would come early that morning so everyone could be there. But no, God knew it just wouldn't work the way I thought it would. Labor began early the next morning, about 3 am. You were so ready to come out & greet us, you arrive just 5 hours later. I love you. You are unique and special. You may someday think that I don't love you as much as I love Will but that is not true. God gives me a special love that is just for him and He gives me a special love just for you. They're a little different, they are expressed differently because you two are different and have different needs. You are my first daughter. You are my Gracie Girl. No one will ever be that. Even if you end up with 10 sisters, you will always be unique and loved uniquely. If you end up with 10 brothers you will know how unique you are every day! I pray now that you will always know that your daddy and I love you and that God loves you. You were a twinkle in His eye before you were a twinkle in mine. Someday soon we'll talk about that, and about so many other things. I look forward to a lifetime of being your mama.
Love,
Mama

Spicy Chicken Gumbo

Tried it again recently, see notes at bottom...
From More-With-Less Cookbook by Doris Janzen Longacre

Serves: 8
Plan 1 hour for cooking, maybe more for prep

Saute' in large, heavy kettle:
1/4 c. oil
2 onions, sliced
2 cloves garlic, minced
1 green pepper, diced

Blend in: 2 T. flour
Cook and stir over low heat until vegetables are tender.

Add:
2 1/2 c. cooked tomatoes
2 c. cooked okra (optional!)
2/3 c. tomato paste
3 c. broth or stock
1 1/2 T. salt
1/4 t. pepper
1 1/2 T. Worcestershire sauce
1/8 t. ground cloves
1/2 t. chili powder
pinch dried basil
1 whole bay leaf

Simmer 1 hour. Start cooking rice.

1/3 c. fresh parsley, chop & set aside

Add to gumbo:
2-3 c. cooked chicken, diced

Simmer briefly. To serve, combine hot cooked rice with chopped parsley and mound rice in center of soup bowls using ice-cream scoop. Pour hot gumbo all around.

My notes:
So after trying this again after a couple years it turned out really good. Good enough that David said we could have this all the time - and that's quite a complement! I used 2 huge chicken breasts and cooked them in the morning, cut up & put in the fridge. I was trying for a half recipe but made enough chicken for a whole.
Used one diced tomato instead of cooked tomatoes, 1 can of tom. paste (was too much), 1 can of chicken broth and had to add water later. Did NOT have ground cloves or fresh parsley or whole bay leaf. Chopped dry bay leaf seemed to be ok. Oh yeah, and I didn't measure most of the seasonings beside Worc. sauce. :)

Chinese Noodle Slaw

Another cabbage recipe... a lot like the other one....

Serves: 4-6
Prep: 10-15 min
Cool: 20 min +

1 head cabbage, chopped
5 green onions
2 pkg uncooked noodles (Ramen noodles best)
1/2 c. butter
1 T. sesame seeds
1/2 c. slivered almonds

1/2 c. oil
1 t. soy sauce
1/3 c. sugar
1/3 c. vinegar (white or cider, it doesn't matter)

Directions: chop cabbage and onions, toss together in a large bowl. Saute' noodles in melted butter, add nuts & seeds until lightly browned, drain. Mix dressing ingredients in plastic container, close with lid and shake well to mix. Toss everything together, cover and let sit for 20 minutes. Refrigerate if longer than 20 minutes. Really good the next day!

Main dish: Lemon Pepper Barbecued Chicken
Other side: Rolls, rice, or fruit

Chicken Cabbage Salad

Serves 2-4
Prep: 10 min
Chill: 30 min +

1 fried chicken breast, cut into chunks
1/2 c. almonds (optional)
1/2 head cabbage, chopped and shredded
2 T. sesame seeds
1 pkg. Chicken Ramen noodles

2 T. sugar
1/2 c. oil
3 T. white vinegar
1 seasoning packet from Ramen
1 t. salt
1/2 t. pepper
1 t. Dijon mustard
1 t. cilantro (optional, fresh is best)

Directions: Cut raw chicken breast into bite size pieces and brown in frying pan. I usually sprinkle with garlic salt and black pepper while they're cooking. Chop or shred cabbage, it may look like a lot but it will shrink with the dressing. Brown seed and almonds in oven for 10-15 min at 400. For sauce toss ingredients in a plastic container with lid, seal and shake until well mixed. Drizzle over cabbage, nuts, seeds and crushed Ramen noodles. Toss, cover and refrigerate for 30 minutes. Place cooked chicken in dressing container, cool in fridge. To serve toss chicken with everything else.

Side Dish: Kaiser rolls, sourdough bread, Rice a Roni

My Notes: I used a whole head of lettuce and 3 chicken breasts to feed 4 people and had 2 portions of leftovers. But there did seem to be way more lettuce than we wanted. Maybe next time I'll use 3/4 of a head with 3 chicken breasts. Also, my husband doesn't usually like cabbage but he likes this one.

Taco-Stuffed Pasta Shells

(from Very Best Baby booklet)

Prep: 20 min (ha!)
Bake: 40 min
Makes 2 8x8 (2 qt.) pans (ha!)

16 jumbo dried pasta shells, prepared according to package; rinsed and drained
1 lb extra-lean ground beef
1 pkg (3 T) taco seasoning mix
1 c. water
1 can (16 oz) refried beans
1 cup (4 oz) shredded cheddar cheese (reserve 3/4 c.)
1 jar (16 oz) salsa (reserve 1/2 c.)
1/4 c. sliced green onions
Sour Cream (optional)

Directions:
Cook noodles as directed on package (may take 15 min.)
Brown & drain beef in lg skillet. Add taco seasoning mix and water, cook over low heat for 5 minutes or until thickened. Add beans and 3/4 c. cheese. OR add beans and split in half, adding cheese to one. Mix well.
Spread 1/4 c. salsa over bottom of both 8x8 baking dishes.
Note: perhaps up to 1/3 c.
Fill cooled pasta shells with meat mixture; place 8 shells in each dish filled side up.
Note: I used 24 shells to fill my two 2 qt. shells, and still had meat leftover. Perhaps a larger pasta shell is needed.
Spoon remaining salsa over shells.
>>>Stop here if freezing<<<<
If baking immediately - Preheat oven to 350. Cover baking dish w/ foil. Bake 40-45 minutes or until heated through. Sprinkle with green onions and remaining (3 1/4 c.) cheese. Obviously, if you've just stuffed the shells w/ hot meat, this won't take as long.
If freezing - cover baking dish wish plastic wrap, then foil. Label and freeze for up to 2 months.

To bake frozen shells: Thaw dish in refrigerator overnight. Preheat oven to 375. Remove plastic wrap then recover w/ foil. Bake for 45-50 min or until heated through. Sprinkle w/ green onions and cheese.

Nutrition facts per serving: 347 cal, 13 g total fat, 32 g total carb, 5 g fiber, 4 g sugar, 21 g protein.

Some other notes: Supposedly each dish feeds 4 people. That's only 2 shells per person by their calculations which makes me think they must be using much larger shells, although I bought the biggest ones I could find. Since I don't eat dairy but everyone else does, I pointed my non-dairy shells toward the handles and then marked the foil with that note so I would remember. The rest of the shells were filled with the cheese & meat mixture & faced the opposite direction. No one wanted the sour cream topping, so that was easy to avoid. Kind of spicy for me even with mild salsa. But everyone else loved it so it's a keeper!

Niks Piks 1

New Recipe!

I found & tried a new recipe last night - Taco Stuffed Pasta Shells. It turned out good but I am making some adjustments to the recipe. I'll post it later.

Pondering Again

So I'm continuing to ponder the issues surrounding being a hostess and a guest. So now I'm browsing etiquette pages to try and find answers. Hmmm. Last night I was a dinner guest at the home of people I didn't know personally, only through others. I was nervous and uncomfortable to start but meeting the hosts helped, and of course time. When I left I had questions circling my brain again & again like airplanes waiting to land in the fog. Did I thank them for the invitation? Did I complement the cook? Several people offered to hold the baby - did I accept their offer graciously or did I come across as an overprotective mom who won't let anyone hold the baby? (Although I did let several people help.) One thing I know I want to train my children is to properly RSVP. Right now I try to respond the day I get an invitation or, if I truly don't know, set a reminder in Outlook for a week before the date. Since I started setting reminders I haven't forgotten to call. So something works.
Hmmmm. Pondering, pondering. I'm throwing a party later this week & I'm already nervous about being the hostess again. I have a to-do list and a to-buy list and I hope I don't forget something. Cake, citronella candles just in case it's nice, card/gift, drinks, utensils, atmosphere, clean the house, etc. It's the etc. that is bothering me. Last minute things will happen and are unavoidable. But I like to try!
This one was fun: http://www.etiquettehell.com/

New Pictures

Here's a little project for Renne' and Malinda: whose feet are who's?










Just trying out the picture function...

Here's a clue: Amanda, Nancy, Jenny, Nichole, Fara, Meridee, Kwi Hyung, Patty & Kim are your options

Non-Dairy main dishes

Since having Nina, I have been on a non-dairy diet. It's healthier for me (I have a milk sensitivity anyway) and she is less fussy. But it's been really hard to give up a lot of the main dishes I used to make. Many of them were a white sauce or called for a cream of ** soup. So, as a reminder to myself that there are other dishes out there, here they are...

Burritos or Tacos (build your own, so cheese is optional)
Pork fried rice/Chicken fried rice
Tuna sandwiches
Teriyaki chicken & rice
Sweet & Sour anything & rice
Spaghetti
Pancakes/Waffles
Omelettes (again, they're individual so those who want cheese can have it)
Chicken Italian Wrap (chicken caesar salad with a twist)
Barbecued chicken with rice pilaf
Oven-fried or baked chicken with baked potatoes
Chicken Kiev also with baked or mashed potatoes

I'm kind of out of ideas right now. Most recipes I usually like for the crock pot have cream cheese or milk. My husband's favorite is a simple hamburger casserole with cream of mushroom soup & tater tots. Oh well, no can do. Pizza, our absolute favorite, is also just about impossible to do without cheese. If anyone has some good ones, I'd love to hear it.

Houseguests

I've had a string of houseguests for the last two months. Some were relatives, some were friends. Some were a joy to have and hardly any work at all. Others were, hmmm how to say this nicely, a drain to me and my husband and it was work to "entertain" them all the time.
Let me skip to two recent guests, I'll call them A & B. Both are very old friends, both are fairly close. A asks if they can do anything before they do it and then washes the dishes right after they make anything. B does nothing until we ask if they want something and then gets waited on. B will "hang out with us" in the living room until we go to bed. A will go to bed at their usual bed time or even sense that we're tired and just go. B doesn't say "please" or "thank you", apparently thinking that the initial "thank you for letting me stay here" does it for several days. A says "please", "would you mind if", and "thank you" for almost everything they do. It almost gets annoying but it is nice that they notice the extra lengths that we are going to for them. Both are familiar, but I enjoy A's familiarity and I feel taken advantage of with B. While I can't do anything right now it brings up questions for me to answer. What kind of guest am I? Do I come across needy, haughty, ungrateful and inappropriately familiar? Or do I enjoy the benefits of familiarity while expressing gratefulness in both word and deed? Is there an inbetween or is A the perfect houseguest? Some of it is definitely personality and I don't think I can completely copy A's manner of making themselves at home and still communicating gratefulness all the time. But B just drives me crazy. By the second night I almost couldn't speak to them because I was so tired (of their company, from my day, of entertaining...) I'd like to put a few questions out there, maybe someone else has a suggestion or maybe I'll discover the answer.
1) what is too familiar?
2) how often should one express gratitude?
3) can I tell a guest that they have worn out their welcome?
4) is it okay to do dishes at someone else's house?
5) what am I teaching my kids, or what WILL I teach my kids?
6) do I have to confront B & tell them (next time) why I don't want to host them? Or can I get away with a "it just doesn't work for us right now" cop out?
Just venting and working it all out as usual....

Welcome

Welcome, welcome to the very first post at Niks Piks. I really don't know yet what this blog will become. One idea is for this to become my idea spot, a place to share ideas for becoming a better wife and mother. Cooking, sewing, cleaning, childcare philosophies or much more? Another idea is for this to be the beginning place to launch Niks Piks, an online gallery of my very best digital photography and images. Who knows? Right now I just have to get more comfortable with this format. Thanks for visiting!