Monday, January 16, 2006

Some decisions are personal

Since I have two small children, one boy and one girl, I get a lot LOT of comments from perfect strangers. At every store, every outing, every errand someone feels the need to tell me that I sure have my hands full! Thanks. I didn't notice. I have gotten used to this comment and just smile & keep on my merry way. But the really annoying one that I am addressing right now is the "are you going to have more?" This one comes up slightly less often than the first, but I also get it from friends & family at social gatherings which makes it seem like I get it more often! So here is my public answer: it's none of your business.

Usually it seems that the motive for asking is 1) to validate their own reproductive choices or 2)being nosy. Thus the answer to the person asking because they are taking a very long, public and un-scientific poll is "none of your business." And the answer to the person asking because they are being nosy is "none of your business."

My children are small and they are both at difficult stages of life. My life and routines change to adapt to their needs and currently I am not ready for another baby. However, I don't know how I will feel in a year or two. I am not going to share my very personal decisions with the public any longer. We love our children and believe that they are a blessing. That's my public statement on this topic. End of discussion!

2 comments:

Jenni said...

We get that all the time as well :) When people say, "are you stopping at three?!" almost a little frantic as if we don't have a clue what we are getting ourselves into, I usually respond with, "oh no! We plan on having lots more!" And then follow up with, but we will take it one baby at a time, we'll see when we get there. Families with 10 children don't have 10 children all at once, they usually have one child and then God blesses them with another, and then about 15-20 years later they have 10. But you are right, it is none of their business. We don't expect people to share our beliefs on family size, nor do we rudely suggest that others seem to have too little children. It's funny how people think they can impose their family beliefs on others:) Oh well!

Jenni said...

We get that all the time as well :) When people say, "are you stopping at three?!" almost a little frantic as if we don't have a clue what we are getting ourselves into, I usually respond with, "oh no! We plan on having lots more!" And then follow up with, but we will take it one baby at a time, we'll see when we get there. Families with 10 children don't have 10 children all at once, they usually have one child and then God blesses them with another, and then about 15-20 years later they have 10. But you are right, it is none of their business. We don't expect people to share our beliefs on family size, nor do we rudely suggest that others seem to have too little children. It's funny how people think they can impose their family beliefs on others:) Oh well!

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