This is my year of weddings. I knew it would be. And after having been to and been in several weddings this year (with 2 more to go) here is a little something I've picked up. Most brides need one thing, one essential thing. A wedding planner. Now you can be cheap & do stuff yourself. But ONLY if you are one of those really organized people, or your mother, fiance' or future mother-in-law, or sister-in-law or any relative for that matter. My husband & I planned our own wedding and we were awesome at it. But that's because we're both really into details. And our mothers were wise enough to delegate a lot of responsibilities to friends of theirs who were also detail oriented, bossy people.
Brides, listen up. You need someone who is NOT IN THE WEDDING (and that nixes your mother) to be your go-to person on the day of the wedding. Someone to find the photographer, locate the groom when he's late or just not dressed, make sure the bouquets & corsages get pinned on BEFORE pictures, have an emergency box of things for the inevitable - the weight you've recently lost & now your dress needs safety pins, the ring bearer got dirt on his face, the flower girl spilled something on her dress & there's only 20 minutes left! Someone to answer your phone, make sure that list of "special poses" you met with the photographer about actually happen, someone to remind you to sit down & take a drink when necessary, someone to be a go-between for your parents & vendors, someone who doesn't care about all the little family drama, someone who can see above or around it & just make sure your special day is the best it could possibly be.
Since my husband & I are pretty detailed & also pretty good under pressure, attending weddings or being in them can get tense & stressful for us. We want to help, but are bound by our obligations & duties in another role: bridesmaid, groomsman, guest, family. Once I happily became the "wedding coordinator" at the last minute. The family realized there was no one to cue the bridal party that everyone was seated. Ta da! I wasn't doing anything else so I gladly offered to do it. Someone to keep a schedule & then locate the right person at the right time. Grandma Hilda isn't here yet? Why not? Didn't she know pictures were at this time? Oh "Planner," please go find Grandma for me!
I'm so NOT kidding. I'm trying to learn to let go & not be such a control freak. But my husband would be great at this. Radios all around, list of phone numbers, schedules, box of emergency supplies, first aid training, he is prepared for any situation. And he will never make you feel stressed, he makes everyone feel at peace. They know he has everything under control. So if anyone reading this needs a planner or coordinator (and don't think about J.Lo in The Wedding Planner, it can be much simpler than that!), leave a comment & hopefully we can help. :) Or if you're a bride & you've already reached the place of not caring, please be good to your bridal party & groom & mother - get a super-organized, super-bossy friend to be your coordinator/planner!
